emotions running wild

Today was regular day... We celebrated my cousin, Julia's birthday. Tomorrow my Brother, Alyssa, Julia, noel and i will be leaving for our grandparents house down in Seattle. our Grandfather wants to take us fishing, which i am not complaining about; it may be just the thing i need to get my head on strait. My brother left this evening to go to a bonfire at a friends house, and this usually wouldn't bother me but he has recently acquired a new girlfriend. she's incredibly boring, and she seems like she has a stick in her ass. The best part of their relationship is knowing it will be over soon... They won't keep in touch when he's away at collage. Everyone around me seems to be happy and yet, i am still  missing something... I have been so unhappy for so long, and all i want is to be really happy; and that's extremely hard to do without my friends. I am having numerous emotions about this coming year. Part of me wants to make the most of next year, but another part of me just wants to feel sorry for my self. Everyone says that feeling sorry for yourself does no good, but as humans with emotions shouldn't we have the right to feel sorry for ourselves for a period of time?